This One's For My Hommie

Jet-setter, globe trotter, road warrior, funding bitch – call it what you will but you’d be hard pressed not to find Funding Boy in some state of travel like all the time. To the airport, to the hotel, to the car rental place so he can drive through God knows where in a spinner-less Escalade to his final destination(s).

This really leaves a girl like me alone and to her own devices (and those devices being a laptop, a search engine and a dream) waiting for the “I arrived safely” calls so that I can then proceeding back to my business of infomercials and texting. So tonight, after he called noting that he had arrived in Philadelphia safe and sound, I could not help but think of Cheesesteaks and bad 90s hip hop.

This got me to thinking – and I have got to say the “coolness” quotient of FB’s travels sure has dwindled since he moved back from Mother England. As you can see by the chart noted below (like I said, a girl alone to her devices) FB currently seems to be in the “ebb” of coolness as noted by y = coolness and x = time elapsed in multiples of 2 since it was easier to create the graph in excel that way.

Figure 1:


Now I am not knocking the U.S. – after all American F-Yeah – but there is a BIG difference between Paris, Texas and Paris, France…I am not trying to be un-American, I am just saying that’s all.

So in my late night quest to keep myself entertained while the rest of the world sleeps, I dug up this video (to which its dance steps I still remember) so that I can properly welcome FB to the bottom of the curve…where the rest of the world lives. Baby, this shout-out goes to you…and all the Philly Cheesesteaks you can eat.